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Here comes the joker
with his silly grin
he carries a martini
made of bathtub gin

Wendy's on the windowsill
Waiting to be let in
And were all in the bathtub now
Making Bathtub Gin


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The Joker
is enjoying:







making bathtub gin:

the joker
31, Pisces
Denver, CO

Windowsill Wendy
is enjoying:

windowsill wendy
29, Capricorn
Denver, CO

"Music is a spiritual expression of what's in your heart. Music as a way of getting rich is a pretty new thing, and I often wonder if the mega-bucks glitzy atmosphere is making the quality of music suffer. You have to work really hard to get around that and remember why you're in it in the first place: because you have to be. It's like an addiction. You can't go a day without picking up your guitar. To me, the only commercial goals that are really valid are, 'Boy, I wish I didn't have to go to work. I wish I could do this all the time."
-Trey Anastasio

"Impose rules to make life simpler. Break them to make life more fun."
-Jon Fishman

Thursday, January 08, 2004

Rambling ahead: The great life planning thing.

posted 10:47 AM by the joker

2004 is going to be a big year for me. I am finishing up my MBA in May, and now I have to figure out what to do with myself. I mean, I feel restless at this job and in this city, and I feel like its time to move on. I am going to do my best to make some major changes for the better.

I took the crazy long road trip around Christmas and New Years to think about some options and try to figure out what to do. I think I get my best thinking done driving alone sometimes. I feel like I am at somewhat of a crossroads of my life, where anything is possible, but this is also somewhat confusing because of the unlimited options that seem to exist.

Here is what I have figured out so far:
1. I want to move to Colorado (Denver, Boulder, Golden, etc.) and am planning on doing this in May/June
2. I want to go to Bonnaroo 2004 again and go “on tour” and play for the month of June this summer (follow Phish or the next best option). I figure I will never have the opportunity to follow a band again, and It is something that I have always wanted to do, so I am going to go for it.

These are really the only 2 things that I have figured out that I am going to do, and I AM GOING TO DO THEM. This isn’t just some pie in the sky half cocked idea, I really am going to quit my job in Dallas this summer, go on tour, and then settle in Colorado.

The second part of this, what kind of job to get and go for, is what is up in the air and will take up a lot of my time for the next 6 months. I had some good meetings with some SMU Alums that were very encouraging and want to help me in my job search. I have also been meeting with some contacts in Dallas, who are, for the lack of a better word, mentors. They all are very encouraging and give me a lot of good feedback and things to think about, but at the same time, it really kind of pisses me off. They all ask the same questions: “What do you want to do?” or “What do you like to do?” or, my favorite, “Follow your dream.” Which seems like it should be easy to answer, but to me is the hardest fucking thing to figure out. I think im getting closer to figuring that out, but I also think im swimming in a sea of dreams and ideas that I will never figure out. In some ways I feel like my Graduate degree opens a lot of doors, but also closes some others- I feel like I have higher stakes now and the level of job I am going for raises the difficulty and effor required to find it.

The meeting that I had this morning, with the president of the ad agency I used to work for, was particularly frustrating and enlightening at the same time. (for those of you keeping score at home, this is also the same president of the company that Windowsill Wendy currently works for.) I went in there because I knew he would shoot me straight, and sometimes its easier to learn things about yourself from others than looking at yourself in the mirror…sometimes things are so close to you and under your nose that its really hard to see it for yourself.

Anyway, I know im rambling so Ill wrap it up- From the meeting this morning my head is swimming and im more confused than I was before. It seems like everything I have to do in 2004 is in conflict with each other- don’t quit a job before you have another one lined up/you have to move somewhere to get a job in a new city—don’t worry about money/you have to think about paying back your MBA loans, hold out for and only accept a job that pays you what you are worth—follow your dreams, don’t care what your parents want or expect/be the good son and make your parents happy—anyway, all I can say is that if there is someone out there that really has their life all figured out, I salute you. Im having a hell of a time myself.
 

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